When You Have to Embrace Change

So the only constant is God. He never changes and this gives me peace. But everything else? Well, I don't have to tell you, that time flies and that child that you encouraged to take their first steps has been walking towards their future and you can't stop it, no matter how bad you want to. Isn't what we raise them to do? Haven;t we been on our knees, praying for this precious one that God has entrusted to us that they will grow spiritually and be prepared for whatever life brings? And now life brings graduation. It seems like yesterday that she wouldn't let go of my hand at the kindergarden tea and really preferred to have friends over instead of going away. And even in high school, she wasn't really a camp person, because she couldn't bring me with her. And the feeling is mutual, she is my heart. and I wish her the best!

I have never been good with change. I cried every promotion Sunday because I didm;t want a new teacher. (embarrassed my mom so much she made dad take me) And now, I'm packing up not one but two of my babies in August and moving them to the beginning of a new chapter! I have done my job and now it's their turn. With the love of Jesus in their hearts and the relationship they both have with Him, the sky is the limit and I can rest easy knowing they are in good Hands. But I will miss them being in mine.

So, thank You Jesus, for giving them to me to raise. For letting me be the one that fixed their breakfast and read stories to them at nap time, for the memories of the lazy days we spent together and watching them taste honeysuckle. Thank You for their little hands that loved to finger paint and make barbie houses out of cardboard, that made bean bags with socks and rocks and held mine so tightly when they needed security. You allowed me to be home with them and raise them to love You and to be there when they took their first steps and all the ones after. You gave me the wisdom  and the words to say when no words would really help, those hard adolescent years when feeling were hurt and they questioned who they were. And when the world told them they were less than, You told them they were worthy. So now, as they step into the next chapter of their lives, when I won't be there physically, I have peace knowing that You are everywhere and they can never go too far away from You, and if they start to stray, You will always gently bring them back. Help them remember what they've learned and to keep You first always and the rest will fall into place. And last, but not least, help me to let go and to trust that You have this. In Your precious name I pray, amen.

stomach flu, dirty laundry and desiring more of Him

This week has really been a mess and the dirty sheets and towels and cleaning up after children, sick ones has been my life. Sweet hubby came home after a two week trip and shared more than his wonderful looks and awesome personality, yes, the dreaded stomach virus. We all went to IHOP, ate like there was no tomorrow, (uh oh 24 day challenge) and in the night it hit him, and i wanted to. No, really, I wanted to. He said it was food poisoning, I knew better...Ever heard of "Reap what you sow"? Well, I ate some crow.

I'm making a confession, I am a terrible nurse, when it comes to a sick husband. I'm great with kids, but I've always had this resentment that he gets to go to bed when sick and I have to do the same thing i always do. So i grumbled and such, and fast forward to Monday morning and I'm no longer able to function. Thankfully I have a husband that is truly full of grace, or at least he is now. He is truly amazing and He took really good care of me and the house. then my son got it and last but not least, the baby of the family, although she is 9, she's the baby. She is still sick, 4 days and counting. So now, I ask forgiveness from God and start over and make sure I take my "in sickness and in health vow "again. Aren't we so blessed that God is a God of do-overs? I know I am.

See, lately, I've been out of sorts, with my quiet time, I mean. And when this happens, I go back to what works, or what really gets me back in the routine. An online Bible Study. I'm reading "Living So That" and it's totally based on scripture. Really diving into God's word, which is the food we need to live in this messy, yucky world, it's His guide to survival, actually to really living the full life He created us for. it's just week one and our first conference call is tonight! I'm so excited! I did one of these for the first time about 3 years ago. My husband had lost his job, we were staring at each other every day and resentment on both sides was building up. But God sent me wonderful sisters, virtual sisters to build me back up and get me walking again and smiling again. Isn't God just like that? First He sent me Jen, from "Finding Heaven". If you haven't read her blog, you must immediately. She has a heart for Jesus like I've never seen. She has had life deal her some yuck, but God has redeemed and restored and she is now writing a book. In fact, her button is at the bottom of my blog, sol de gloria!

Next, He sent me a link to Proverbs 31 ministries, online Bible Study, Wendy Blight was the author. I can't remember the right name for the book but I think it's "Hidden Joy in a Dark Corner". This book taught me how to pray God's word back to Him, to choose a topic that I needed help on, maybe a fruit of the Spirit like patience . Then look up in the reference for verses on patience and put them in prayer form. Changed my life!!! She encouraged me to step out and try new things, and really changed my prayer life. I encourage you to read it, as soon as possible. God may begin to ask you to do things out of your comfort zone but He will equip you to do the task. I know...

Fast forward to another hard time and I picked up the book 1000 gifts and I've never been the same!! I have since read it 5 times, listened to it at least 15 times and have dome 3 book studies on it. Every time I read it, I hear something i missed or maybe I didn't really need it at the time I read it last. Ann Voskamp has an amazing blog too, an amazing writer and Jesus follower, it's called "A Holy Experience". so now, you have a few ideas. And last is Girlfriends Coffee Hour. I got invited on Facebook and accepted. I had no idea that I would become a blogger and writer, all because of a lady that believed in me. She and a few others prayed over my family and broke the chains of spiritual warfare and prayed my husband a job that would finally get us on our feet. I still blog for them, so look them up. And most of all, keep His word close. For weeks like this one, when I couldn't do this on my strength alone, He guides my steps, He gives me courage and joy when I don't think it's possible. My God is the God of Impossible. What is your impossible today? Are you ready to believe He can and will do it for you? Whats stopping you from handing it over? Praying for you today that you can leave it all at His feet, and let Him fill you with all He has to give!

blessings!!!

Happy Birthday Daddy!

Today should be a national holiday, I joked with my mom this morning. Although my sister and I might really think so. You see, it's my daddy's birthday. He not only gave me life but he gave me a second chance for a new life. Eternal life. Born again at 8 at a Billy Graham crusade. He took me to church on Sundays. Wednesday and most of all he lived what he told me. He provided for us. I needed nothing. I wanted for nothing. He loved us. Deeply. I could see it on his face when I walked in a room. He's proud of us. And now that I'm a mom I have a whole new appreciation for him. As an adult I put them through storms. I struggled with addiction and so did they with me. He had patience. He never brings up the past. He's given me grace. Forgiveness. Unconditional love. He now gets to do the same for my kids. The legacy continues. They too know his Jesus. They too will live in eternity with Jesus. So today I celebrate this precious man. The awesome memories and the love and lessons I've learned. Here's to more. And here's to always being together. To infinity and beyond!!